As Mother’s Day 2020 approaches, comes, and leaves there are so many emotions to process. Through this pandemic, I’ve analyzed my failings in motherhood, but one thing brings me back from the pits and that is knowing my kids are safe and sound. God doesn’t give us the future, just day by day, and since there is no way to know the future, it’s the deepest blessing to have all of my children here with me. Well, all but one. My Angel Baby is in Heaven with other loved ones, and while I think more of my loss today, I also reflect that without this precious and short life, I would not be enjoying the blessing of my youngest son’s life. God doesn’t give us the future, there was no way to know what would come from the pain of loss, but day by day, the deepest blessings find their way to us.
There are Mothers mourning the loss of their children for the first time during this holiday. There are Mothers mourning the loss of their children for years, and the loss is just as fresh as it ever was. Maybe “Happy Mother’s Day” isn’t the greeting that fits, but the honor of your role as mother is still worthy of deep celebration.
There are Mothers who’ve lost their only babies before they ever took their first breaths outside of their wombs. Mother’s Day may not feel like the event you are invited to join, but the honor of your role as Mother is still worthy of deep celebration.
There are Mothers caring for children whom they did not biologically give life to, Mothers who could not care for their children and made a way for them to be raised by others… and Mothers who have a combo of biological, step, halves- adopted- and choose to love like their own without labels. The honor of your role as mother is worthy of deep celebration.
For the future Mothers, the ones who’ve been trying for so long it hurts, and for the ones who wanted to be Mother but that dream (for whatever reason) was never realized…for the Aunties whose love has shaped the lives of so many children, your role as Mother is so worthy of deep celebration!
For the Mothers who are doing this job without a life partner, feeling lonely and needing a break, needing some encouragement, hoping someone sees them, we see you! We love you! We are awed by you and virtually draw you into a safe embrace.
This holiday can be full of joy and full of loss at the same time. Some of us have waited so long to be invited to this one that not having an invitation, or feeling like our invitation has been revoked, is devastating. While I don’t have the answers or the ability to mend broken hearts, I do have words. When you can’t hold your baby, hold to your memories. You are deeply loved by a Creator who understands your pain. And while it doesn’t change your reality, my prayer today is that you experience the deepest level of love from God that you’ve been waiting for and didn’t know was possible.
And if you feel like me, and struggle with all sorts of emotions like feeling unworthy of the precious lives placed in your care because of all your mistakes, I pray for us, that we allow God to help us forgive ourselves. Each day is a new day to start fresh. The honor of being Mother is not to be taken lightly nor hinges on the amount of time you’ve spent in the role. For the first-time Mommies, still in the midst of days of no sleep, it’s okay if all you do is sleep on your day! Giving life, pouring into life, sharing life, and more often than not, putting life ahead of your own happiness are all aspects of what we do daily, though our roles can look so different, as diverse as we are as humans. Wherever you find yourself today, your role of mother is deeply honored.