He Gave Me A Melody

Tonight we visited friends that live in the same town as my first teaching assignment, Pottsboro, Texas. Driving by the intermediate school where I taught my first three years coupled with going through pictures and notes from that time (this past week while packing up) really sent me into a deep nostalgic mindset.

My friend from our hometown in Missouri to landing in Pottsboro together!

As we drove by and I pointed so my children would look, the thought that I may never drive by this iconic place again, really stuck with me. This place, town, friends, former colleagues who meant so much to me at one time…. So many have, like me, moved on to different places. But those memories of them, they were real again, thinking of the track I walked miles around, halls I walked up and down, the spot where my homeroom and I planted flowers one Earth Day, and mostly the people whom I shared the time. I imagined my first classroom and science lab that were more home to me than any place I rented, just inside the building walls.

No one in the car had the same powerful connection to the place my adulthood began and started to blossom. And yet, had I not started blooming there, I most definitely would not be who I am right now.

Here I am, 38, mother of five, wife of one, and forever an educator who is staring down the road to another adventure…one taking me to another starting point, another cast and crew, and another place to bloom. But I wouldn’t be able to had I not traveled other, transformative adventures, first. Had I not made lasting memories and important friendships and connections….

I coached softball, basketball, and volleyball those first three years.

So much can change in such little time. My children are growing so quickly, my husband and I are graying and getting older so much faster than when we first began. Here we are, 12 years later….

And, well, I’m just grateful for my memories. I’m grateful to be able to look back with gratitude, a prayer of thanksgiving, and more hope for the future than I’ve ever had….

The many connections and deep friendships made will not die in the time and space that will surely grow between us, but onward we look to bloom and create new memories that will also forever change us into the people we become. It’s such a sweet and temporary spot that time allows us to remember, grieve the quick passage of time, but then press forward. I don’t know that looking back is a positive experience for all, but tonight, I remember I am who I am today for everywhere I’ve been, everyone I’ve known, and everything I’ve learned along the way.

This box was made for me by a former student my last year in Pottsboro. Inside were pictures and notes.

Let’s face it, kids are hardcore honest. Once I had a fourth grader let me know about my wild and crazy nose hairs! True story! During a parent conference!

But sometimes kids bare their souls and we aren’t listening, we aren’t seeing. We may see hours later what we missed or we may never know, but there is no professional development better, or more true, than what these tiny or smaller humans are teaching us.

Today was such a day for me. I like the social studies curriculum we use very much, it offers online resources, and I like that it’s more current than the textbooks I grew up reading. Today we started reading and learning about the government, who is in charge…and then this picture came up.

Years ago, this picture wouldn’t stick out to me in any way, but today, it made me super aware that not every child in my class would see this picture as I see it.

In fact, two of my students, both boys, and non-white, spoke up and said this picture made them feel sad. One little boy said it made him feel afraid. I asked if he wanted to explain why he had fear, and he bravely said it was because he was afraid they’d come and take away his daddy….

This is first grade. This is not a hardened, cynical youth or adult, this was from the innocent of innocents.

We listened to him. Then, we sang about empathy because even if they didn’t understand the connection just yet, it was my job to plant the seed.

Because I was listening.

Years ago in my teaching prep courses at Southeastern Oklahoma State University, we were asked how we would teach/be culturally responsive in a diverse environment.  I answered the question by copying whatever the text said and that is why I do not remember what I wrote, only that I had absolutely no idea what I would do.  We were required to spend 75 hours in schools that were high in populations of Native Americans, African Americans, and Hispanic Americans.  What I can recall is that the school where I spent hours with the Native American populations were frightening.  The school was dirty, old, and completely filled to the maximum capacity.  Right across the Red River, the schools where I spent with the two other groups, were completely different, as in modern, clean, and less scary for a teacher-in-training! This was in the early 2000s.

Fast forward to 2019 and most of my  years teaching have been in a public school where my white skin is in the minority and we are classified as Title 1, meaning most of the students are on free or reduced lunches. Being culturally responsive was not something I was aiming for per se, but it has definitely become a required skill to remain relevant for my students.  I wish I had taken courses on this subject, but thankfully, bonding with my students and their families gave me the education I needed.  I can honestly tell you that the desire to know and understand what motivated my students was where my education in culturally responsive teaching began.  Also, my colleagues of color have impacted my teaching practices.

Here is a list of some culturally responsive traits:

1. Positive perspectives on parents and families
2. Communication of high expectations
3. Learning within the context of culture
4. Student-centered instruction
5. Culturally mediated instruction
6. Reshaping the curriculum
7. Teacher as facilitator

Taking courses on being culturally responsive may not be necessary if you are on the path of finding out how to bond with your students.  When building  foundational relationships with young people, some of these traits are natural, like being welcoming to families.  Over the years, my students taught me that they were more highly involved in learning when I was talking less and they were doing more, my role as a facilitator was shaping itself and my own pedagogy was more student-centered.

The two strongest indicators, for me, that I was becoming more culturally responsive in my teaching practices, was when I was able to reach out to my students and ask them how I could help my students of color more, and when my personal friendships started growing with more non-white people.  One young lady shared with me she felt noticed and as important as all other students, for the first time, in my class.  The comfort we felt while talking about our differences and appreciating each other was real.  I listened more to my students and the wise teachers who took me under their wings. Becoming friends with more people who were African American, Hispanic, Asian, or biracial has given me glimpses into perspectives I would otherwise never have.  I know being able to address cultural differences with people close to me has really challenged and changed me!  AND I LOVE IT! I’m absolutely grateful for those relationships and the way I’ve grown because of them.

Relationships, conversations, and learning how to appreciate different perspectives is what has formed me into a culturally responsive and relevant educator.  While more natural for others and less natural for some, if we are willing to listen and learn, more of us in education can cross the divide that oppresses our nation, and be part of the unifying factors.  That is probably one of the coolest things about being in education, being a unify-er of people!

If you are interested in growing in this area or helping others grow in this area, hop on Twitter this Tuesday and follow one of my favorite chats, #FlocabChat.  While on Twitter, under the search button, type in #FlocabChat and click on the “latest” tab.  Our chat  begins 7pm CST and 8 EST.

 

Although I have grown so much in this area since I first became a teacher, I know I still have much to learn.  Listening and asking questions to educators in the know is one of the best ways to begin this important journey!

When my husband and I were daydreaming about an adventure in a far off place, there was no thought of what it would feel like to say goodbye. This evening, as I prepared for tomorrow, tears fell as I fully took in that there wasn’t much more time in the building that is my second home.

I started thinking about all the students who hug me in the hallways, even though they’ve never been in my class… I remembered so many fun memories with co-workers… And I started praying for the teacher who takes on this beautiful class after me, that she will know what she’s doing, love and appreciate my students, and that they won’t feel like I deserted them.

How can a job take over so much of your heart? I felt panicked because it felt like I was saying goodbye to a part of myself. And it really hurts. I reflected on this, asking myself is it just my ego? But I know it is not.

One of my best qualities is jumping in with my whole heart and one of my worst qualities is jumping in with my whole heart….So probably the brokenness I feel is just natural.

I have nine more days doing this awesome job. I hope these next two weeks will be memorable, and I pray my students will remember how much I love them. There’s still so much I need to take care of before I go, I want to make sure being busy doesn’t rob me of the special times ahead.

I won’t feel guilty for talking with my friends after work. People are the most important part of my profession, and the relationships formed these last few years run deep. I look forward to the last parent conferences, too, for the same reason.

When I’m not residing in my second home anymore, school will still go on, my students will still learn, and the year will be full of all the things. My heart will still be there, at least a part of it. And that means it truly was a work of heart.

For #WorldReadAloudDay, a fellow first grade teacher and I used Skype to invite author, Elizabeth Roach, into our classroom.  She wrote and shared her story How Carlos Became Brave.  This story was about a young man who was afraid to go down a tall slide, but his older cousin helped him overcome his fear by sharing with him how he was able to overcome his own fear, first.  Afterwards, our students had an opportunity to share with our class and Ms. Elizabeth about things in their lives that caused them fear and how they overcame it.  Ms. Elizabeth shared with us that her inspiration came from her own fear of heights as a child and overcoming them as an adult, and her characters seemed to be born from her many years teaching in Peru.  Ms. Elizabeth is a very loving and caring woman, I could gather that with her patience for her antsy audience and her lifetime devotion to teaching young and older people.

This experience had us conversating about all the different things we have been afraid of.  I shared about my experience about climbing up a high-dive as a child, only to turn back around and go back down the ladder, all the while being laughed at!  When I was a little older, I climbed a high-dive to conquer my fear, jumped off and repeated this five times in a row, but it never felt fun to me! It always felt like I was jumping off a building, and I decided that I gave it my best shot, and I didn’t let my fear cripple me, but jumping off the high-dive was not going to enrich my life!  One little boy drew and wrote about his fear of tornadoes and storms, to overcome this, he started to learn how to enjoy the rain.  Other kids wrote about slides as this was a common fear many had to overcome, just like Carlos!

We finished the day by reading Junie B. Jones: Toothless Wonder.  Junie B. had to overcome her fear of the tooth fairy!  It was hysterical and we all had a great laugh, but overcoming fear was the only thing I could think about as I fell asleep.

This past week, I put in my resignation and gave a three week notice.  My husband’s job is relocating us to Anchorage, Alaska as soon as we can get there.  We’ve thought and prayed about this for months, moving to Anchorage. We want to give our kids an adventure and a life outside of what is normal to them now! This opportunity to see life differently is priceless, but it doesn’t come cheap!  The idea that I will get to stay at home, home school, and take care of our youngest children has been a goal for us as we have a large family.  I did re-enter the workforce a few years ago out of financial desperation and we’ve always hoped I’d be able to return to staying at home with our children and home schooling….

But now it’s here.  The time to put our dreams into action has come.  My last two weeks of working as a first grade teacher at a school I helped open over ten years ago is upon me.  There is excitement and wonder, but also a lot of sadness and FEAR.  A good friend told me last week that if I wasn’t afraid it wouldn’t be an act of faith, and I whole-heartedly agree with this.  I feel certain that this is exactly our next path in life, my faith is everything to me, and I know God is ordering our steps.  It’s just… now it’s here, the action part is being required of me, and there are so many things I’m afraid to leave behind:  my community whom I love, my first graders, my home, my career (it feels like it is just taking off), my family and friends…. We are leaving so much behind.  I even had the thought last night Lord, what was the purpose of me growing in the way I have if I’m just leaving it all behind?   This is FEAR.

There is so much promise in our future! There is being together as a family, and there are new life experiences waiting right around the corner.  There are new places and faces waiting for us to meet.  Did I mention we will all be together as a family? There is a slower pace to life that is necessary for us as my husband still heals from heart surgery.  There is writing and authoring books, there is going back to school to earn another degree, there is snow—so much snow that my children are desperate to play in!  How can I be so positive that this is where we are supposed to go, and yet, feel so much fear about leaving everyone and everything I know behind?

Well, I guess that is truly where faith begins and grows.  This past week, my family read of Abraham, his son Isaac, Jacob & Esau, Rebekah, Rachel, Hagar, and Joseph! The Bible is full of people stepping out in faith, leaving their lands, even in fear, but then being blessed more than they could ever imagine!  Can I see where I’m going now? Can I see how God used this entire week to show me that He has been with so many before my family and He will continue to be there for us as we take this leap in faith?

Carlos conquered his fear using three steps: go up the stairs, learn how go to down little by little until he went down the entire slide, and practice landing!  Then he could be like his cousin and help others conquer their fears and enjoy something that is thrilling!

My first step is to enjoy these last couple weeks of school, work with all of my heart with the little ones God put in my life for a reason.  My second step is to just keep going.  Keep the big picture in mind, knowing that my family will be together and that grieving is okay, but keep going and moving forward.  When we get to our new place, we will be exhausted, I’m sure.  We will miss our family and friends, I’m certain.  But we will also be so excited for this new adventure!!!! I’m positive!!

I will face fear and sadness, but I will be brave.  And I’m going to keep singing about it, too.  Hope you’ll join me for the ride.

 

Bringing people in and making global connections has been the theme to help my students fall in love with reading and develop their social emotional learning, since we’ve come back from winter break. I wasn’t sure how it would work out, but after Skyping or using Google Hangouts, with an author and other story-telling-educators, I hope to encourage other teachers to give it a go!

If our students had their way, we’d have so many more field trips, but money and time can put a limit on those types of learning experiences. But after using Skype a couple of times with other educators in my Professional Learning Network (PLN), I decided to use it as a tool to bring the outside world in to give my students an opportunity to learn from others through the art of story telling. Every story has had a strong social emotional tie-in and some of my students’ confidence levels have been boosted as they communicate back with the adults on the screen!

These story telling educators range from a published author, Instructional Coaches, classroom teachers, and even one of my former students who is studying law! They have brought a little of the Midwest, southeast, and west coast into our lives! We’ve even had some fellow Texans!

The stories range from I Want To Be Like Poppin’ Jo, Pete the Cat, The Little Engine That Could, The Giving Tree, The Rainbow Fish, Oh, The Places You Will Go!, Have You Filled Somebody’s Bucket Today?, The Circle Unbroken, and The Mixed Up Chameleon! We spend time reflecting after each story. My students are learning that reflections come from your heart and mind. We’ve used written words, drawings, and discussions when we reflect. It’s turned into something my students look forward to and ask if anyone is going to Hangout or Skype in to tell them a story today?

I have enjoyed getting out of my comfort zone and growing in this area. Google Hangouts has been easier than Skype and less technical problems. A couple of times, these sessions were the first time I’ve talked with members of my PLN outside of Twitter or other social media! It’s been fun for all of us!

So if you feel like you are not tech-savvy enough to pull this off, I want to encourage you that being a bit uncomfortable has made this more fun! I did have some tech issues but nothing that made me want to quit! Yes, my kiddos got antsy and sometimes talked too much, but other times they addressed people politely, and stood and answered questions using complete thoughts! It’s been amazing to see how some students’ attention and focus have improved the more we do this!

School can get so boring for all of us! I hope this time of connecting to others, in different parts of our country, will be a memorable experience for my students and I hope their confidence will continue to grow! I hope they will naturally reflect more with their hearts and minds after this time. I even hope they’ll fall in love with reading!

So if you want an idea to put a little joy back into your day, a Skype or Google Hangout Story Telling session might be just what you need! And February 1st is World Read Aloud Day so you still have time to line something up! I just asked people if they’d read a story and they were more than willing to connect with us!

Would love to help you in this endeavor, too! Best wishes!